For those of us who have realized that our family is the world....

 The life of a freelance writer like me is often unpredictable. 

We don't need to wake up at 7:30 am and iron our clothes...best of all we don't experience getting stuck on traffic. 

We wake up anytime we want and we can stay as late as 4am discussing ideas with some random stranger on Facebook.

My life consists of different parts and different experiences but it does not mean that my life would be immune to ridicules...even from my  natural family members.

At times...

I wonder how many of us have been called a failure by our own family because we are not able to fulfill their idea of success. 

I ask myself that at times where I feel the pressure coming from family members.

 You see at the age of  25... still not married and not sure if I ever will,  still with no children, a web content writer--a job that is not considered an official job by many because it gives me many hours of free time and I own my time.

There are a lot of people like me, we do not fit into the stereotype of life and many parents, siblings, aunts and uncles question our mere existence--because we chose to live another kind of life.

 People like me do not wear a corporate suit,  our office is our room, no car either and no plan to buy one...because I love walking...I love taking pictures of the trees while walking.

I am one of them, one of those individuals who chose to live my life according to my rules. I could have easily followed what my parents wanted me to be.

 I could have taken up Nursing so that I can bring home thousands of dollars to my own family like majority of my classmates did. 

I could have chosen to become a doctor like my dad.

Instead I rebelled against the idea and took up Philosophy instead.

In college and even today Philosophy is a so called non-existent course because it does not pay well and guess what people still deem it useless...despite the fact that all of those philosophical principles have led me to escape the idea of suicide--it taught me to question everything about my life--and to seek and to seek--a learning  that thousands of dollars would not be able to convince me to do----

I took another course which is related to teaching--units in Social Studies--

 I am a teacher and I have a license but I chose not to teach inside the classroom because I feel that even though it is a noble job that is not the path to learning because you wil get stuck inside a classroom--

I hate routines. I don't believe me should be grading children from 65-95..intelligence cannot be graded.

 I do not like correcting test papers.

 I only give public lectures for free because when I am inspired for the day and I want to share the feeling of inspiration and joy that I felt--i share it with friends...

  In many ways I am still a teacher... a teacher who has chosen to teach a wider classroom--the world...I have no awards...no records of any paper trail from any company. 

Education destroys creativity...that is the truth... just recently I have decided to teach in Bangkok, Thailand.  With the idea that if I want to rebel...in the fullest sense of rebellion...let me learn the rules then and perfect them...then break them all over again. 

A big irony for my life but it is with the idea that if you want to break the rules...you have to understand it yourself...

Imagine a freelance writer for 4 years who would undergo working for a company...now that is a challenge.

I did try becoming a call center agent I ended up depressed due to the lack of sunshine and social interaction and promised to never take that job again...because a 17,000 peso salary is not enough to sacrifice my entire life.

How many of us are despised by our own family because we have not fulfilled their wishes?

 How many of us are ridiculed because we want to save something that others think is pointless. Like some of my friends there are a lot of times where in I am not able to attend birthday parties.

 I am not able to provide gifts for my niece and nephews and most of the time I am not at home...I am somewhere else, traveling or listening to a newly written poem in a bookshop...

I have always been an activist...not the super active kind but I have had my share, in school when there are rallies against tuition fee increase I join them--we could easily pay my tuition but then after talking to a classmate whose parents are carpenters I felt the need to stand up for them, for those people who would not be able to pay their own tuition- 

i felt the need to join my classmate after he told me that he only has 20 pesos allowance everyday while our SLU internet card costs around 300. 

 I felt the need to expose the fact that our school Comfort rooms have no decent flush and toilets and after the protest I cannot help but smile because Louisians are now enjoying better schoo facilities than what we had.

Recently I have been called a radical woman for wanting to fight the biggest corporate giant in the country Henry Sy together with a lot of Baguio residents even those that are coming from abroad.

 I stood there inside SM City baguio realizing how empty it was to have a brand new shoes...how empty it was to have beautiful clothes but an empty life devoid of meaning and happiness. 

 Because I have seen what it means to live and to sing and to be simple and to be creative that I want to share it--artists and genuine people exist and they taught me a lot of things I believe I have to share it---to defend it for as long as I could with people who believe...with people who others think are crazy for fighting Goliath.

Believe me when I say that the journey and the sacrifices have not been easy....my own family thinks I am doing something weird, something pointless, something stupid because it does not earn my loads of cash--but how will I tell them that in every step and every group I join I gain life.

 Many of them tell me that I should just to Canada and I should just work there all my life, earn Canadian dollars, build a house, buy a car, wear fancy clothes, impress my friends with my brand new gadget every now and then. give birth to children who will have no fighting chance to enjoy this world because of how most systems work and then die.

If there is one thing I have realized in all of this rebellion against the normal things in life---I have realized that our duty is not just  merely to our own family---because our real family is the world. Our community and the people around us.

 Many times our own family members would not be able to understand what we are doing.

I have some of the most eccentric friends, friends who choose to dance near the bonfire for 4 hours. Friends who paint, who create art from junk, friends who sing their own tunes, friends who have devoted their lives to protecting the rights of others..people that they do not even know. 

 I have friends who when diagnosed by a psychiatrist would immediately fall into the category of clinically insane, with bipolar disorder and so and so.   But come to think of it..people who are diagnosed with insanity? children with ADHD..and so and so forth...are they really insane or do we just live n a very repressive and restricted world?

I guess the point here is that despite the idea that I am not successful because I do not own an Iphone5..despite the idea that I am not earning dollars and despite the idea that I am not able to provide thousands of pesos to my own family---- I am happy.

I chose this path and I am forever going to love it.  I could have taken that nursing job but I think I would be sitting in a hospital somewhere hating myself because I did not heed what my heart wants.  Yes, I could be earning thousands of dollars and my family would be impressed with me big time...but then I would not be happy. I would not be happy because I have not searched the  meaning of the questions I have asked earlier on.....I am not saying that money is not needed...I am just saying should it be the center of our world?

i love my life for what it is...as of this moment...i get to travel with friends, sit on the grass. Sing by the river...hear them play the guitar. I have seen people in trance mode.

 I have seen people who are happy despite the fact they have no money inside their wallet. This people live without worry,they do not own huge malls or houses or cars...yet they are able to share... share life with people around them..with people like me. 

You see...we have to fight for what we want in this life because according to a quote I have read...if we follow the dreams of our parents, siblings, teachers and any other person in the planet instead of ours...once we realize we are lonely we have no one to blame but ourselves.

I still feel the sting and the pain when my own family asks me why I am not this or I am not that...but all of this pain is worth it. You cannot expect to be understood by everyone but then again...I still hope that in the future they will understand....

they will understand that our duty is not just to our own family...but to the world. If we can just go out of our own shell and give.. this world will have a fighting chance...

Education destroys creativity...that is the truth... just recently I have decided to teach in Bangkok, Thailand. A big irony for my life but it is with the idea that if you want to break the rules...you have to understand it yourself...

Imagine a freelance writer for 4 years who would undergo working for a company...now that is a challenge.

And this blog of mine would be a witness to all of the stories that will be created...the title would be...the Freelance Writer who has attempted to teach inside the current Education System... we will see...

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